What Wives Should Know Pt.2: Keep it Sexy
While I am very supportive of the Barbies of the Night, I also admire the idea of a happy marriage. I personally, am in an open one. Biologically speaking, we were never meant for monogamy. Different people have different attachment types, that being said, if an exclusive relationship is what you want, ladies, make it happen! According to morality and societal expectations we are supposed to marry one person and stay with that one person for the rest of our lives, staying faithful, both man and woman. Guys, don't be an asshole and cheat on your wives. Ladies, keep your man interested. My girlfriend AP and I talk about this topic ALL the time. If your man has certain things he is into accommodate him! Tell him your desires, this is what makes "married sex" turn into good sex. Example: I had the filthiest dream last night, I rolled over and told my hubbycakes all about it and he fucked me just the way I wanted in my dream. Don't be embarrassed of what you want! I cannot emphasize that enough. I know, it is super cliche to talk about the importance of communication but that really adds to the relationship and keeps it strong. I don't care how naughty your fantasies are, just tell him. He will love the honesty and openness that brings to your relationship.
The second biggest point my girlfriend and I both agree on is stop being comfortable! Yoga pants are for working out. I understand how long and how much it sucks to style your hair and paint a full face on, in addition to caring for children, keeping up housework, and/or working. This is crucial though ladies; we live in a world that is centered around visuals and appearances. If you wear tee shirts everyday please don't be upset when your mans eyes start to wander. Men are simple creatures. They like attractive things, to be fed, and sleep. A wise woman once said, "Never let your man leave your house hungry or horny." I agree to this completely. I am sure every feminist is cursing me up and down right now but I'm sorry, this is the way life works. If you don't want to spice it up, open your mind to swinging or at least an open relationship. We all love attention. If you don't give attention or effort don't be upset when someone else does. Life is all about the small things- show your appreciation for him and what he brings to the home. Do little things like cook his favorite meal when you have time opposed to ordering take out. Dress sexy for him when you go out on dates. He chose YOU over every other women he has met. I recently left for a 10 day business trips and left I love you notes all over the house hidden in different places he would eventually find. Guess what? He LOVED it. How long did it take me? 2 minutes before packing my luggage in my car. Just show appreciation, it goes further than you think.
I'll open up for a second and take my own advice, on a different point- listen to what he has to say. I am admittedly the WORST for this. I have several things always going on at once, I am so pressed for time/ always late, my phone is glued in my hand; I half listen to what my other half says. We've even had fights about this when he's leaving for a conference and I freak out because he didn't tell me he was going out of town. Spoiler alert: He did. I was just too engaged in my own world to give him the attention he should receive. Women are very emotional creatures and want our significant other to listen to what is going on in our lives and hear our stories, believe it or not, men want the same. We think men and then we think sex, but what is sex? Attention. Listen to what your husband tells you, no matter how small. If it is important enough for him to point it out to you then stop what you are doing and acknowledge said subject.
To reiterate, I don't think monogamy is realistic BUT I can promise you if you treat your husband like a king (unless he's a sociopath asshole) he will treat you like a queen in return.
At the end of the day its karma, you get what you give.